The Fastest Way to Get Started in Multi Level Marketing

Being successful in MLM is challenging, but the great thing about it is that it doesn’t take any special talent. It does take some hard work and an intelligent approach to growing your business. Once you have those in place, you can look forward to an exciting experience!

Follow these steps to get off to a fast start:

  1. Make a decision. Nothing significant can happen until you make the decision to do something. Making a decision means that you cut yourself off from all other possibilities. So decide that you’re going to be successful and that no challenge can stop you from moving forward in your business.

  2. Schedule your time. Most folks decide to fit their MLM activities around everything else. That is, they do it whenever they have time. This is the wrong approach. You should schedule this work just like you would anything else that’s important to you. Make a schedule and stick to it.

    • Consider spending about 80% of your time growing your business and 20% learning more. Most people tend to do it just the opposite and are never successful because of it. Track how much time you’re actually spending on activities that can make you money.

  3. Get a success team. Surround yourself with like-minded people that are successful at what you’re trying to do. Find some people locally if you can; use an online community if you must. It keeps the motivation high, and you have a source to turn to for answers. Remember that this is part of the 20% and not the 80%.

  4. Limit your prospecting. After you tell your friends, family, and neighbors what you’re up to, give most of the prospecting a rest. There are better ways to spend your time.

  5. Market. One of the M’s in MLM is for marketing. This is where you should spend a lot of your 80%. Marketing is the ultimate source of your success. Whether you’re looking for downline members or customers, it’s a lot easier to convert leads to dollars when the leads are contacting you. Trying to turn a cold call / cold approach into a payday is tough!

    • Utilize technology. The great thing about the Internet, Twitter, Facebook, and other technology is the tremendous leverage. They’re essentially free and allow you to reach a large number of people.

  6. Find a successful mentor. A successful mentor is someone that started where you are and has reached where you want to be. Don’t get a mentor that makes $1,000 a month if you want to make $10,000 a month. Spend some time and find the right person.

    • Keep in mind that the most successful MLM-ers don’t waste a lot of time. You might want to offer them something besides the benefit of a warm fuzzy feeling. Maybe you could do some work for them. Maybe you can give them a percentage. Be prepared to reciprocate your time.

MLM is a great business for those that are determined and take intelligent action. While there are no shortcuts, there are plenty of less than direct routes to get to where you want to go. Follow these tips and you can get off to a fast start. That first check is closer than you think.

What To Do When You Have More Than You Can Handle

Life is a series of challenges to be managed. In between challenges, life can seem easy, but the next challenge is always on the way. When faced with too many challenges at once, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed and to believe that you have more going on in your life than you can handle.

Regardless of the size or the number of challenges you may face, the solution is the same: Ignore those things you can’t influence and spend your time and energy implementing solutions for those things you can influence.

A level head, a solid plan, persistence, and assistance can overcome any challenge life may bring.

Try these strategies to lighten your load:

  1. Acknowledge that you’re feeling overwhelmed. There’s nothing to be gained by ignoring your situation. You’ll be in a better position to deal effectively with your life when you acknowledge the reality of the situation. When you recognize that something is wrong, you can begin to do something about it.
  1. Take a time out. If you’re at work, slip away for a quick walk. If you have the freedom to do so, try taking a weekend trip. A change of scenery can make the challenges in your life seem more manageable.
  1. Make a plan. When you’re feeling overwhelmed, it’s easy to spend too much time focusing on the challenges in your life. While this is a natural response, it leads to feeling even worse! Rather than focusing on your issues, try focusing on solutions.
  • Imagine your friend was facing the same challenges, what advice would you give to them?
  • Make a plan to move beyond your current situation. What solutions can you find? How will you implement them?
  • A simple change of focus can alter your perspective and your mood. Do you think you’ll feel better focusing on your problems or the solution?

  1. Distract yourself for a few hours. Read a good book or take a friend to the movie theater. Now is the perfect time to do all the things you usually do to avoid working!

  2. Talk to someone. You could speak to a coworker, a friend, family member, or a mental health professional. Who would you call on in your life to talk you down off a ledge? Pick up the phone and include someone else in your current situation.
  1. List the good things in your life. Things might be rough at the moment, but there are plenty of things in your life that you can be grateful for. Make a list of them and reflect on the many blessings in your life.

  2. Laugh. Few things feel better than laughing. What makes you laugh? Rent a funny movie or spend time with someone that always finds a way to make you giggle. Who is the funniest person in your life?

  3. Get some help. More heads and pairs of hands can get a lot more accomplished than you can all by your lonesome. Most people are pretty bored and would jump at the chance to help you deal with your drama. Get some help.

You have plenty of options when you think you have more to deal with than you can handle.

Life isn’t always sunshine and rainbows. When life becomes especially challenging, feeling overwhelmed can dampen your spirit and hide the best solutions from you.

Admit to yourself that you’re struggling and begin looking for solutions. Allow yourself a few distractions when you need them. Reach out to others and avoid trying to solve everything on your own. Soon, you’ll be back on a more enjoyable path.

15 Questions to Ask Yourself to Discover Your True Passions

If you’re lucky, you’ve already discovered many of your passions and get to spend much of your time enjoying things that bring you excitement and joy. However, maybe you’ve not yet connected with activities, skills, and interests that ignite your passion.

It takes time, soul-searching, and some life experience to identify your true passions. These prompts are written to tap into your wants, needs, desires, and fantasies. Have fun with them and discover what you can add to your life that will fill it with delight.

  1. What’s the one thing I’ve always wanted to do? Consider what would need to happen in order for you to carry through with this long-sought wish. Make a plan and get started.
  2. If I could spend today doing whatever I desire, what would it be? Let your mind go. It could be something related to your work, your home, or simply a lark.
  3. Where do I really want to live? What city and what type of residence? Perhaps you’re already fulfilling this passion and you do live in your true first choice. If not, ponder the possibilities of moving to a place you’ll love.
  4. Where would I like to visit? Perhaps you’re harboring a secret yearning to visit Washington, D.C. or Westminster Abbey in London. The streets of Hong Kong may be calling your name or even the Grand Canyon. Can you make it happen?
  5. What do I talk about doing but never do it? In a conversation, you might state something like, “For the last 10 years, I’ve really wanted to take a cruise to the Caribbean.”
  6. What are the reasons I don’t go after my dreams? Explore within yourself why you haven’t pursued the life you want. Can you do something differently to help bring your dreams to life?
  1. How will I finish the sentence, “More than anything, before I die, I want to ___________?” Say it out loud and fill in the blank. Then, figure out a way to accomplish your wish.
  1. What are the things in my life that I would like to get rid of? If you’re discovering you don’t love everything about your life, maybe it’s time to do some “housecleaning.” Make a list of the ways you’d like your life to change.
  1. Which people in my life inspire me and why? It’s important to know who inspires you so you can spend more time with them. What is it about them that lights you up so much? Decide to take every step to be inspired more often.
  1. If I were to make just one radical change in my life right now to make life better, what would it be? Your answer to this question will really open up your possibilities. Moving to a bigger city might really spice up your life. Getting more education might be a goal—plus you’ll likely make more money.
  • You’ll be happier if you chase your dreams. Make 1 change.
  1. How do I feel when I put all my effort into accomplishing one of my goals? Notice these feelings. You’ll no doubt want to experience them more often.
  2. How do I feel whenever I achieve a life goal? Awesome, probably.
  1. What’s missing from my life? Answering this question requires considerable soul-searching.
  1. Who are my biggest supporters? It’s wise to know the people that will stand behind you and help you pursue your passions, no matter what.
  1. Who gets in the way of me achieving my goals? In order to find your true passions, you might be required to disengage from those who wish to counteract your efforts.

If you take the time to thoroughly ponder each of these questions, you’ll be pleased with what you discover. Your true passions are inside you, just waiting to be let loose to bring you excitement, joy, and fulfillment.

What Do You Want? How To Design A Plan For Your Life

When you engage in active planning, you’re highly likely to be more successful in life. You know what you want and how you intend to get it.

Maybe you already have your life all planned out. Maybe you don’t. Either way, these tips will help you devise or tweak your Life Plan so you can move forward toward realizing the joy and fulfillment you deserve.

Take some time to answer the following questions about what you most desire. Who knows, you may have a detailed Life Plan before the week is done!

  1. What are your dreams? Allow yourself some “dream” time to clarify to yourself what you really want. Be as over-the-top as you like. Then, write them down.
    • There’s no limit to the number of dreams or how large they are. Life provides opportunities to let go of certain goals and add new ones. Infuse your Life Plan with all your dreams and goals.
  1. What’s important? Whatever you feel is crucial to you should be reflected in your Life Plan. Maybe you’ve always wanted to have more education. Perhaps you’ve wanted to travel but haven’t the time or money to do it. If you grew up in a rented home, owning a home might be the single most important thing in your life. If it’s important to you, include it.
  1. What do you want to accomplish? What deeds do you want to achieve? Now’s the time to write down what you want to do with your life. Is working on a church mission something you aspire to do? Do you want to win an award in your career for your work performance?
    • List what you want to attain in the personal, professional and educational areas of life.
  1. What standard of living do you desire? Your answer will describe the life you want to lead. Do you want to live in a high-rise apartment in the city? Do you want to own your own farm in the country? Maybe you prefer to live simply and pick up and go wherever you want.
    • Perhaps you want to earn more money, live in a large house, drive an expensive car, and enjoy wearing pricey clothes. In essence, you seek the high life.
    • Thoroughly investigate what standard of living you want so you can include it in your Life Plan. Search your soul. There are no “wrong answers” when you’re developing your Life Plan.
  1. Do you have fun? Maybe, to you, having fun means locking yourself in your study to write romances all day. You might find training and running a triathlon to be the time of your life. Activities such as bowling, practicing yoga and traveling to Europe also qualify – whatever brings you joy.
    • If you answer this question with a “no,” it’s time to get serious about your fun. You’ll require some time to cogitate about activities you might enjoy. When was the last time you kicked up your heels? List activities that you love to do. What is life without some fun?  
  1. Are you spending time with friends and family? Generally, those who are the happiest make time for their family and friends. If this issue is important to you, include it in your plan.
  1. What do you do for your community? Giving back to your community cultivates feelings of gratitude, satisfaction, and fulfillment in your own life. Donating money, time, or energy for the good of others enables these positive feelings to be an inherent result when you write them into your Life Plan.
  1. Are self-improvements high on your list? Striving to excel helps keep you moving toward your life goals. Include short term achievements for many areas of your life.

Develop your Life Plan soon and feel free to change it as your wants and desires evolve. Having a Life Plan keeps you focused on all your goals and will motivate you to reach for the stars.



If you enjoyed this post, I invite you to take a moment and sign up to receive the BusyGal Bi-Weekly Affirmation Inspiration in Your Inbox.

Affirmations are simply statements that are designed to create self-change in the individual using them. They can serve as inspiration, as well as simple reminders. They also can serve to focus you attention onto your goals throughout the day, which, in and of itself, has the potential to promote positive and sustained self-change.

Proponents of the “law of attraction” often refer to this as raising our vibration such that when our vibration is positive, positive things—such as financial abundance, love, and renewed health—are magnetically drawn to us.

You can sign up HERE to receive the BusyGal Bi-Weekly Affirmation Inspiration in Your Inbox.

Discovering Your Life’s Purpose

There is a purpose for your life, whether you believe it or not. You may have to take several paths, but with a little digging, you can find where you’re meant to be.

The first clue to figuring out your purpose in life is to consider what natural talents, gifts and abilities you’re born with.

  • Are you artistic or musical?
  • Is it easy for you to talk to people?
  • Are you a natural communicator?
  • Do you love to socialize?
  • Do you love to decorate and rearrange your home?
  • Are you good at taking charge?
  • Are you creative and crafty?
  • Do you understand electronics and technical gadgets?
  • Do you understand computer technology?
  • Do people compliment you on your style?
  • Are you a good writer?
  • Do you have good organizational skills?

Once you figure out what talents naturally live within you, you can then understand what you’re supposed to be doing with those gifts and talents. This is your purpose in life.

What Do You Love to Do?

Have you ever sat down and really reflected on what you love to do?

There are literally millions of possibilities, so start with the gifts and talents you were born with. From there figure out what you love to do that requires using those gifts and talents.

  • If you’re artistic or musical, teaching others how to draw, paint or play an instrument may be your calling in life.

  • Being naturally social, you might consider being an organizer for social events.

  • If you’re always redecorating and rearranging your home, why not get paid to do it and start an interior decorating business?

  • Being a natural born leader opens all kinds of doors that could lead you in many different directions. Does your church or other local community groups need someone to head up a department? You may find your purpose there.

  • If you’re good at making crafty things, helping at a preschool or elementary school may be fulfilling for you. Using your creative ability could open the door to a career in graphic arts as well.

  • If you’re technically minded, perhaps you might consider using your understanding of electronics to fix equipment or you might enjoy working in an electronics store.

  • If you have a strong knowledge of computers, you’re certain to find a career online or with a high tech company or you might even consider starting your own business.

  • If you’re naturally stylish and love to keep up with what’s new in the fashion world, perhaps designing your own line of clothing or accessories is your purpose. Or maybe you’d enjoy helping others discover what style works best for them by working in a clothing store. Another option may be to offer your services as a fashion consultant to those who are unemployed, so they can learn how to dress professionally for job interviews.

  • The love of writing may be something you don’t even realize yet. With blogging becoming the most popular way to market a business, getting paid to write is a great way to make money from home. Many people have started a simple blog that has turned into a money making machine. Start by writing on topics you already have knowledge about and go from there. You might be surprised at how much money you can make with your love of writing.

  • Using your organizational skills, you might be fond of going into homes and getting them ready for sale or helping elderly persons organize their homes. You could also offer your services online as an organizational consultant or teach those who aren’t naturally organized.

Finding your purpose in life simply takes self-reflection as well as some trial and error. Free yourself from wandering through life without purpose. We’re all here for a reason and, once your find your purpose and begin living it, you’ll feel happy and fulfilled!

The Reinvention of YOU – Increasing Your Self-Esteem

You might have discovered lately that you aren’t feeling as positive as you could about yourself. Maybe you’re disappointed in how you look or some of the emotions you feel. Your attitude might slip a bit at times and you find yourself making self-deprecating statements to others.

How can you get out of this rut and reinvigorate how you feel about yourself?

These strategies will help you get back on track and increase your self-esteem:

  1. It’s time to take a good, long look at yourself. Although it might be scary or even a bit disappointing, the sooner you do it, the quicker you’ll be able to get yourself back on track.
  2. How’s your physical appearance? Consider any changes you’d like to make to how you look. It’s common to go through life phases when you don’t take the care with yourself that you usually do. For many, a new haircut and some extra attention to personal grooming goes miles toward increasing self-esteem.
  3. Look at yourself with a kind eye and make some decisions on what you can realistically and financially do to improve your appearance. As you probably already know, your appearance is paramount to how you feel about yourself. Improving your appearance most likely means you’ll improve your self-esteem.
  4. Recognize your strong points. Although your mind hasn’t been in a place to really notice what you’re good at, take some time now to do just that. Maybe you’re a great cook, wonderful with kids, and the hardest worker at the office. Every single person has strong points and it’s important for you to know what yours are.
  5. Remind yourself what you truly love about you. Maybe it’s the way your green eyes shine or your red hair makes your facial features stand out. Perhaps you’re consistent about doing exercise or you’re brilliant at keeping the conversation going. You’re even in awe of the patience you have with others or your willingness to step up and volunteer to help out others.
  6. When it comes to you, what are you the most proud of? What do you consider your greatest achievements? We all have something to be proud of. Figure out the things about you that you take pride in to raise your self-esteem a few notches.
  • Maybe you keep an organized house or wash your dad’s car every week without fail.
  • Perhaps you write a good story or can keep your cool when your kids are acting out.
  • Did you work your way through college without any help or support from others?
  • Accept compliments openly. Make eye contact, smile, and say, “thank you” whenever people pay you a compliment. After all, people aren’t going to go to the time and trouble to pay you a compliment unless they believe you deserve it. Relish in the good things about you that others notice. Embrace those positive comments. Doesn’t it feel great?

You can reinvent yourself by taking steps to increase your self-esteem. Look within yourself to evaluate what you need to feel better about yourself. Make changes in your physical appearance, open your eyes to your strong points, and be aware of what you love about yourself. Acknowledge what you’re most proud of and embrace compliments.

As you do these things, your self-esteem will soar. The reinvention of you will be successful and complete!


If you enjoyed this post, I invite you to take a moment and sign up to receive the BusyGal Bi-Weekly Affirmation Inspiration in Your Inbox.

Affirmations are simply statements that are designed to create self-change in the individual using them. They can serve as inspiration, as well as simple reminders. They also can serve to focus you attention onto your goals throughout the day, which, in and of itself, has the potential to promote positive and sustained self-change.

People use affirmations for a variety of purposes. Generally speaking, affirmations are used to reprogram the subconscious mind, to encourage us to believe certain things about ourselves or about the world and our place within it. They are also used to help us create the reality we want—often in terms of making (or attracting) wealth, love, beauty, and happiness.

According to Walter E. Jacobson, M.D., there is value in affirmations of this nature, because our subconscious mind plays a major role in the actualization of our lives and the manifestation of our desires. What we believe about ourselves at a subconscious level, he says, can have a significant impact on the outcome of events.

At the simplest level, when we feel good about ourselves and have a positive attitude, our lives tend to run smoothly. Proponents of the “law of attraction” often refer to this as raising our vibration such that when our vibration is positive, positive things—such as financial abundance, love, and renewed health—are magnetically drawn to us.

You can sign up HERE to receive the BusyGal Bi-Weekly Affirmation Inspiration in Your Inbox.

How to Embrace New Chapters in Your Life

As you’re well aware, life is full of changes. Sometimes, the changes occur when you least expect them, and you end up with your routines being thrown out of whack. That’s how it often is when new chapters are opened up in your life. You might get caught by surprise, and immediately get flustered because you’ve never dealt with being in that situation before.

It’s easy to lose composure when you’re going through something totally novel to you. It’s easy to give up because you feel like you’ve lost control of your life.

The good news is that you can approach these life events with positive techniques that keep you from feeling intimidated by them.

Follow these strategies to not only deal with, but also embrace, these new chapters in your life:

  1. Have an open mind. Expect the best scenario instead of the worst. Remind yourself that you’ve made it through more challenging situations before.
    • Embrace the idea that this event might bring with it all sorts of positive spins on existing situations that challenge you. This new chapter in your life could be the answer to your reaching previously unattainable goals.
  1. Exercise courage. Fear can keep you from achieving what you want out of life. It can turn strong men weak and result in disappointment, sadness and humiliation. If you picture living a life with those negative attributes, you’ll start to develop the courage to prevent that from happening. So face the unknown with every ounce of courage you have!
    • Even when you’re not feeling courageous, tell yourself you’re brave. Walk into a situation while repeating the words, “I have what it takes to conquer this.”
  1. Take one step at a time. By far, the easiest way to approach any situation in life is to break it down into its smallest parts. When looking at the big picture of your new chapter, it might seem mammoth and insurmountable. But if you take a minute to dissect it, you’ll realize it’s a lot easier to take smaller bites and even savor the taste of newness.
  1. Be guided by past mistakes. Nobody you know has more experience in your life than you do! You know your strengths and abilities, and you also know where you went wrong before. Those learning lessons should be the tools you take into life’s new chapter. Use them as much as possible to help guide you through the unknown.
  1. Be honest. If your new chapter in life is something being presented to you by someone else, be honest about feeling intimidated by it. If you’re expected to tackle it and come out victorious, you definitely don’t want to disappoint! It’s better to state your position up front because people respect honest even when it doesn’t favor them.
    • New chapters don’t have to be scary at all. You’d be surprised how perfectly capable you are of taking things head-on and relishing in the goodness they can provide. Give yourself the chance to experience fulfillment; use these strategies to embrace new chapters like you already know the outcome!

If you enjoyed this post, I invite you to take a moment and sign up to receive the BusyGal Bi-Weekly Affirmation Inspiration in Your Inbox.

Affirmations are simply statements that are designed to create self-change in the individual using them. They can serve as inspiration, as well as simple reminders. They also can serve to focus you attention onto your goals throughout the day, which, in and of itself, has the potential to promote positive and sustained self-change.

People use affirmations for a variety of purposes. Generally speaking, affirmations are used to reprogram the subconscious mind, to encourage us to believe certain things about ourselves or about the world and our place within it. They are also used to help us create the reality we want—often in terms of making (or attracting) wealth, love, beauty, and happiness.

According to Walter E. Jacobson, M.D., there is value in affirmations of this nature, because our subconscious mind plays a major role in the actualization of our lives and the manifestation of our desires. What we believe about ourselves at a subconscious level, he says, can have a significant impact on the outcome of events.

At the simplest level, when we feel good about ourselves and have a positive attitude, our lives tend to run smoothly. Proponents of the “law of attraction” often refer to this as raising our vibration such that when our vibration is positive, positive things—such as financial abundance, love, and renewed health—are magnetically drawn to us.

You can sign up HERE to receive the BusyGal Bi-Weekly Affirmation Inspiration in Your Inbox.

Ways to Use Your Spirituality to Help Your Business Thrive

Using all the resources at your disposal naturally brings you greater success in your business. Number crunching and data analysis are helpful, but you have other tools available. Your spirituality and instincts have been developing and growing since birth. It would be a shame not to use them to your advantage.

Use these strategies to enhance your business with your spirituality:

  1. Sit quietly with your mistakes. Most of us avoid our mistakes. They create too much discomfort. But mistakes have always been the primary way that humans learn. Embrace your mistakes by sitting quietly and examining the source of your error. How much would your business be enhanced if you never repeated mistakes?
  2. Set your intentions high. Get in touch with your soul and realize how great and successful your business could become. Set a big goal and stick to it. Most substantial goals aren’t met because an easier goal reveals itself along the way. Utilize the power of high intentions and be consistent.
  3. Let go. Learn to forgive and move on. That includes forgiving yourself. Learn from challenges and then release yourself from them. Holding on to a grudge or the past ultimately punishes yourself and your business.
  4. Allow your spirit to guide your business. Logic and quantification have their place in any business, but the most successful businesses have more guiding their decisions. Trust your gut when the data runs out.
  5. Be enthusiastic about the unknown. It’s only necessary to see the next step clearly. Everything else might be a bit murky, and that’s okay. Any impressive accomplishment has at least a bit of the unknown.
  6. Meditate or pray on challenges. Getting upset by challenges is similar to a reflex. It’s possible to develop a more effective habit. Meditate on your business challenges and calmly seek a solution.
  7. Show gratitude. To feel gratitude, you must first focus on those things for which you’re thankful. Take a few minutes each day and feel gratitude for the things that bring you joy or satisfaction in your business. At the very least, it will create a more positive state of mind.

Are you currently using your spirituality to your advantage in your business dealings? If not, you’re ignoring a great source of guidance and strength. Give your spirituality the respect it deserves and apply it to your business activities. You’ll have a significant advantage over your competition.

I’d love to hear from you if you are currently utilizing your spirituality in your business as you work towards achieving positive results & goodwill for yourself and for your clients. Please drop me a line and tell me about it at TheBusyGal@gmail.com. Selah.


If you enjoyed this post, I invite you to take a moment and sign up to receive the BusyGal Bi-Weekly Affirmation Inspiration in Your Inbox.

Affirmations are simply statements that are designed to create self-change in the individual using them. They can serve as inspiration, as well as simple reminders. They also can serve to focus you attention onto your goals throughout the day, which, in and of itself, has the potential to promote positive and sustained self-change.

People use affirmations for a variety of purposes. Generally speaking, affirmations are used to reprogram the subconscious mind, to encourage us to believe certain things about ourselves or about the world and our place within it. They are also used to help us create the reality we want—often in terms of making (or attracting) wealth, love, beauty, and happiness.

According to Walter E. Jacobson, M.D., there is value in affirmations of this nature, because our subconscious mind plays a major role in the actualization of our lives and the manifestation of our desires. What we believe about ourselves at a subconscious level, he says, can have a significant impact on the outcome of events.

At the simplest level, when we feel good about ourselves and have a positive attitude, our lives tend to run smoothly. Proponents of the “law of attraction” often refer to this as raising our vibration such that when our vibration is positive, positive things—such as financial abundance, love, and renewed health—are magnetically drawn to us.

You can sign up HERE to receive the BusyGal Bi-Weekly Affirmation Inspiration in Your Inbox.

The Determination of Creative Women

From our Connected with Kathleen Cooke Section.   
Re-published with permission from Kathleen Cook. 

Originally posted on www.KathleenCooke.com July 5, 2019
and in her Blog influencelab.com/women
Web/blog: kathleencooke.com
Twitter: @kathycooke

In a recent Wall Street Journal article, What Women Artists Knew About Work, Mason Currey cites Harriet Beecher Stowe’s (“Uncle Tom’s Cabin”) letter to her sister-in-law with these words…

“Since I began this note, I have been called off at least a dozen times – once for the fish-man to buy a codfish – once to see a man who had brought me some baskets of apples – once to see a bookman… then to nurse the baby –then into the kitchen to make a chowder for dinner and now I am at it again, for nothing but deadly determination enables me to ever write – it is rowing against wind and tide.”

As I sit at my desk and computer hashing it out with a multitude of to-do’s nipping at my feet, I feel very close to Harriet.  It requires determination and sheer work to find the time to read, think, research and write but I am compelled to do so by the pounding drum within me. 

Finding time to create was difficult for many women throughout history. In many ways we have it easier today but media distractions can be one of our fiercest opponents. Technological advancements have disrupted and loaded our lives with interruptions and the one highest on the list is the smartphone in our hands. Its unrelenting grasp hooks us. We often get blindly swept away following social media, watching YouTube or are mesmerized by video games.

Women of the past had multiple distractions since so many worked from home. Most were solo entrepreneurs who produced in their own creative spaces. They had to learn to discipline themselves and learn business skills on their own.

The entrepreneurial spirit continues today. According to a 2017 survey by Remote.co, 28% of women who work remotely are CEO’s and leaders of their own companies compared to 5.2% of women working in S&P 500 companies and 6.4% of women in Fortune 500 companies. Interestingly, 90% of women surveyed chose to work remotely because of the barriers they felt from men in top leadership positions. Another reason was the inability to be a family caregiver due to conflicts in the workplace. The New York Times reported in 2017 that “half or more of the women who earn an M.B.A. that year would drop out of the full-time workforce within a decade.” 

I had several distractions, including children, before I was able to fully pursue my first passion: theatrical acting. The balance of work and home responsibilities often continues to deter women from pursuing artistic and business endeavors. However, my dad, a basketball coach, often inspired me with these words from his mentor, former UCLA coach John Wooden, “Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do.” My dad taught me to be persistent and not to be deterred by interruptions. My heavenly Father has also taught me that when you are pursuing what you are called to do by God, interruptions won’t deter you either.

Completing a project of any kind may have momentary interruptions, many of which can’t be controlled. Some may only last moments and others, years. But one thing I have discovered is that there is real joy and contentment when you are in the zone of creative work doing what God’s called you to do. When you are in the middle of where He wants you, it doesn’t matter if it gets difficult. You’d do it again and again because it breathes life into your soul. It allows you to communicate with God fully. 

At the end of editing my devotional, Hope 4 Today: Stay Connected to God in a Distracted Culture, I was given a 24-hour deadline by the publisher due to printing issues to complete the final draft. I was forced to stay up and work all night, shoving all other responsibilities aside. Surprisingly, the time flew by. I found myself energized within the sleepiness because I was driven to submit a manuscript that I felt had been inspired by God. 

Headwinds can never deter those who are “called according to His purposes.” (See Romans 8:28.)



A Second Chance in the Second Chapter of Life

by Felicia M. Lopes
Twitter:  @TheBusyGal
LinkedIn:  https://www.linkedin.com/in/feliciamlopes/

There are times that your life changes suddenly.  At those time I feel like my stomach kisses my backbone and my hands start itching and aching like crazy!  I can still remember my life going into total upheaval mode when I was told unceremoniously by my boss 4 years almost to the day that I’d been hired at my job, “I’m sorry, but you’re fired!”  


A few days ago, those same feelings came rushing back at me like an avalanche as I sat in Starbucks drinking my favorite coffee, scrolling through my iPhone, when Jennifer Lopez’s new film, which is coming out this Holiday Season, came up on my news feed.  It looks hysterically funny (that’s code for I can’t wait to see it!), because as a women, now in hermid-50s, that moment in 2006 when I was 42, utterly changed my life!  I still wince from the financial aftermath — the sting of losing my job — remembering it so clearly as if it were yesterday, because it was the start of a Herculean uphill financial battle that lasted many years!

Check out the trailer below and see if it doesn’t resonate with you:

SECOND ACT Trailer (2018)

Getting back to my story.  Apparently the Executive Board had lost their contract, so, through no fault of my own, I was laid off!  As most people do after a job lay off, you start marketing yourself furiously so that you can get another job — any job to pay the bills, especially if you live in Forest Hills, Queens (NYC) where I lived at the time, and where my rent for my 2 Bedroom apartment was over $2800 a month! 

I’m a “glass is half full kind of gal”, so to tell you the truth, I was actually kind of excited and hopeful about the prospect of finding something new.  As I have a Masters from Columbia University which I’d earned only 7 years previous to that time period in my life, I figured that it would take me no more than 3-6 months to find another position.  

Sister… How wrong I was! 

To this date… I have NEVER been able to get another permanent full-time job with benefits!  I physically have documented that since 2006, I have sent out well over 2500 resumes to employers for positions for which I am absolutely qualified.  I was interviewed several times for high level positions in NYC and even called back for additional follow-up interviews at several companies – a few up to 5 times!  But every single time I was informed a few weeks later, that they’d hired someone else for the job via a letter like this…

Dear Felicia,
Thank you so much for sending us your resume and cover letter.  We enjoyed meeting you, but we regret to inform you that we are moving forward with another qualified candidate… yada, yada, yada, yada, ya ….  

You get the drift!

The ultimate humiliation came when I was told “off the record” by a well meaning head hunter, that my problem was that those hiring  want to hire people younger than me, because I reminded them of … wait for it… their “Mom” as I was now 46!  

Can you just image being told that!?!

It took me a long while, but I finally woke up and realized a truth.

The only way to guarantee income into my household, was to be in business for myself!

So after much prayer, reflection, research and re-education (I call it PrR&R), I bootstrapped my own business and I vowed to make three essential changes to my life. 

Change #1:  Develop A Positive Mental Attitude Reading Regimen

I began by putting myself on a reading regimen to “brainwash” or rather “brain flush” the negative that had permeated and manifested itself into my life up until that point.  I started reading classic positive mental attitude books like Think and Grow Rich, by Napoleon Hill, The Power of Positive Thinking, by Norman Vincent Peal, and Dale Carnegie’s How To Win Friends and Influence People.  I devoured books by successful female writers such as, Arianna Huffington’s Thrive, Fearless and Free, by Wendy Sachs, Answers Unleashed by Olympia LePoint, Womenomics, by Claire Shipman and Katty Kay, and Goddess on the Go by Leora Edut.  Ultimately, I set reading goals for myself so that I can finish at least one book every 2 weeks. 

Change #2:  Hang With and Listen to Successful Business Owners 

Additionally, as I build my business I know that the more I listen to successful people who’ve built fantastic businesses of their own, the better I become at my business.  I listen to podcasts like  The Big Shift, The Marie Forleo Podcast, Oprah’s Super Soul Conversations, and She Did It Her Way because I need the inspiration to keep on keeping on!  Additionally, I schedule into my calendar, local, regional and national meetings and conferences to go to, where I can meet  successful people and associate with them.  This way I can model their success habits into my own business. 

Change #3:  Focus on the Spiritual 

Lastly I started focusing more on the spiritual needs of my life by becoming more grateful and thankful.  I remember when this epiphany occurred.  I was sitting in my basement apartment in Santa Monica.  I had just moved there, I had no money in the bank, and I had no job.  Real inspirational success story there, right?!  What’s crazy is that I woke up and I heard God, speak to my heart and I realized that though I had nothing in the bank, I had a roof over my head, food in my belly (not one day did I go hungry) and clothes on my back – and stylish clothing at that!  Though I had no job lined up, I had hope and good prospects that some how or some way soon, He would provide for me.  I started saying to friends – tongue in cheek, “God is letting me ‘suffer’ in style while living in Santa Monica” – which is one of the most expensive areas of the country to call home! 

As I continue to build my business – now in my hometown of Dallas, Texas (that’s a whole other story for another time!) – I have come to realize that I am not alone as a middle aged female business owner.  According to New York Times writer Kerry Hannon’s 10/3/2017 Article, which is absolutely worth a read, check it out HERE, “in 2016, there were an estimated 11.3 million women-owned businesses in the United States — a 45 percent increase since 2007, according to the 2016 State of Women-Owned Businesses Report from American Express.”  The article goes on to state,…

“Female entrepreneurs, particularly those over age 50, are igniting intergenerational entrepreneurship partnerships and collaborations among women of all ages,” said Elizabeth Isele, founder and chief executive of the Global Institute for Experienced Entrepreneurship. “Intergenerational partnerships between women dispel age-related stereotypes and build strong bonds across age, race and ethnicity in our increasingly diverse workplaces,” Ms. Isele said.”

If you fit into this demographic – being a a women who wants to start your own business and you’re in your 2nd or even 3rd chapter of life being in your 40’s, 50’s, 60’s or even 70’s – take a minute to ask yourself and answer these 3 questions: 

  • When you were a young girl, lying in your backyard looking up at the stars in the sky, did you imaging living the way you are living now? 
  • Is your Income Circle as large as your Dream Circle? 
  • Can you honestly state that you are happy and financially secure with where you are in life at this stage of life? 

I believe that all Women Over 40, 50, 60 or even 70 need a second chance because 9 times out of 10, most of us did not “get it right” in our 20s and 30s and we aren’t necessarily where we dreamed we’d be at this age.

If all your answers are YES to the questions above…  then “Hooray for you!!!!  You got it right in your 20s and 30s!!”  But I bet, 90% of you have answered, NO.  

So please for your sake and for your sanity, consider starting your own business and push hard for your own dreams!  I know I did it, and though it is one of the most difficult things I’ve ever done, it is also the BEST thing I’d ever done because…

My business became my second chance in my second chapter of life and it can also be that for you!

Felicia Lopes trains and empowers Women Over 40 who want to start businesses and become entrepreneurs nationwide through her robust online learning management system which features 3 Curriculum, 8 Core Courses, and over 70 individual classes (or modules).  Join her this coming 12/20/2018 for her webinar — Cultivating the Entrepreneurial Mindset where she will walk you through the minefields and  mental hurdles most Adults Over 40 face when launching a new business.  Register here to attend this information packed webinar.